Did you notice? Cause I did... And I can't help but cry.
I don't know why but Christmas doesn't make me smile anymore. It's like it disepered with my dad. I was sad that Christmas before the police knocked on the door.. like I knew something was going to happen. Maybe I did, maybe I just didn't wanna admit it even to my self.

And this year again it feels wrong, like something is about to go wrong and I'm scared. I'm scared that something gonna happen to my mom or to my grandma, she's sick and my mom isn't much better sadly.
Or maybe it's coming that's gonna happen to my fake aunt, I may not like her right now, I may be angry as hell at her all the time. But I do love her, she's family and I don't want anything to happen to her.

I love all my family and all my friends, no matter what.

She's worried to, I can see her and feel her outside, passing back and forward, she hasn't left for days, she never done that before. I wish I knew Terry Evans, then I could ask him if there's really someone out there or if I'm going stir crazy here.

Well that's that.
Love you
Xoxo

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